Earlier today, I was a spineless clot of grievances. (I believe that was a quote from a Beth Moore Bible study… I just love it and it has stuck.)
I woke up grouchy. I dunno why, but I just was. Perhaps the chocolate bar my daughter gave me yesterday… Or I’m just a sinful human being who wakes up grouchy sometimes. And then stays that way much of the day.
I’ll spare you the ugly details, but there was whining, arguing, and bad attitudes on the part of my children, and yelling, snapping, and poor responses on my part.
I was just on edge for most of the day. My kids had a rough time and I did not respond well to their issues.
The point? On the outside, when we went to swimming lessons and later to the gym, we all looked fine. Smiling faces, a patient, self-controlled Mom… What a nice homeschooling family! Many times it’s a show, people. There are definitely some days that I’m more patient than others. Sometimes what I eat or what I ate the day before (a REALLY intensely yummy chocolate bar) contributes physiologically to my short fuse. I’m not always a psycho, irritated monster. But some days I am.
When you have a bad day or are tempted to compare yourself to that homeschooling mom who looks like she REALLY has it all together, remember that even SHE has bad days. I’m not saying that everyone is a hypocrite, but we all naturally try to behave ourselves in public.
I heard a story somewhere about a family that was on the cover of a parenting or homeschooling magazine. In the picture they’re all smiling and loving each other, but minutes before, during the photo shoot, the kids were bickering, parents were barking at the the kids… But all we see is the pretty picture.
So don’t beat yourself up when things go badly and you don’t respond well to your hormonal student or when it takes every ounce of self control not to throw the 6th grade English book out the window (literally). Confess your sin to God, accept His forgiveness, perhaps apologize to your kids or hubby if needed, and move on.
You’re not alone. You’re a great Mom. God loves you more than you can imagine, even when you mess up. His mercies are new every morning.